why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
