Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
