What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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