The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
