Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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