This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
