so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
