People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
