The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
So I just went to clothing optional bar
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
