i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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