The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
