i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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