If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
We were destined to go to rehab together
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize
