I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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