one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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