So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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