How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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