I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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