Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
