...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
