C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
