Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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