i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
