wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
