And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
