wat bout pragnant strippers??
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
They took my balls.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
