South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
