is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We don't watch enough power rangers
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
