Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize