Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize