Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
