i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
