He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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