Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
