Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize