If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
