My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
