He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
