There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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