well you can't waste a boner
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
