If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I need water and some morals
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