come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
