Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
