HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
