Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
