Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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