get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
