i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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