The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
She even gives head with a lisp.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
