if i can run in heels then i can drive
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
