dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
