its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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